Bubsy in: Fractured Furry Tales - Atari Jaguar. Is it really that bad?

 "Oh sure, let's all torch the Bubster" - Bubsy the Bobcat, 1994.

Bubsy, Bubsy, Bubsy. Just the name of this Bobcat is enough to instil hatred and spite in the heart of even the friendliest of gamers.

It's 64-bit, so it must be good, right? You do the math.

This failed mascot was created by Accolade to compete with the vastly more successful Mario and Sonic. Probably the most cringe-worthy part of Bubsy's failure is the amount of effort put in to making him the 'hip new thing'. They even had a cartoon show pilot made based on the character.

Widely known as one of the most annoying characters in video game history, appearing in one of the hardest and more generally, worst, video game series, are all of the Bubsy the Bobcat games really that bad?

Today I'm going to play the third, and probably least well known game of the series, "Bubsy in: Fractured Furry Tales" on the Atari Jaguar, released in 1994. It seems somewhat fitting, a failed mascot released exclusively on a failed system (not to say that the Jaguar is inherently bad, it just had alot of disappointing games, to say the least). So without further ado, onto the game! 

Here we go!

I've literally been playing for less than 5 minutes and I must have died about 10 times. The water kills you. If you don't hit the enemies in exactly the right way, they kill you. Cookies and balloons (because they are obviously evil villains) kill you. If you fall down too far, it kills you. Enemies throw barely visible projectiles at you, which kill you.

To put a long story short, this game is so hard it could cut diamond.

As you run around, the level of Bubsy's inertia increases dramatically after about a second. This would be fine, this kind of mechanic can be done really well, and even improve the gameplay by giving you something else to master (obviously Mario is the perfect example, but for something closer to Bubsy's inertia check out Psycho Fox on the Sega Master System) but in this case it just makes it insanely hard to time jumps. You can't stop, because you'll have to run back again in order to get enough speed to clear a gap, but if you go too fast you will inevitably run into an enemy, land in some water or some other horrible fate. To make matters worse, if you run into a wall, you become stunned. And this isn't half a second of stun, to teach you not to be so foolish, this is a full 6.95 seconds (I timed it) of not being able to move, while some arsehole enemy that you just carefully dodged slowly walks towards you to dispatch you. Heugh.

Oh, I get it. I mean, it's not funny, but I get it.

To be fair, a hard game doesn't necessarily mean a bad game. Believe it or not there are merits to Bubsy. The graphics in general are very colourful and other than the aforementioned hard-to-see projectiles, you can tell what everything is supposed to be. Everything fits in nicely with the fairy tale theme,  the first level is Alice In Wonderland (although actually, that being a fairy tale is debatable). 

You see Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee, killing you with their yo-yo. 

You see the March Hare, and he's obviously late, because he kills you by running. 

You see pink flamingos, not being used as croquet mallets, but for some reason they're punks. 

Punks who want to kill you. 

You also see a huge floating cat head (presumably the Cheshire cat) which kills you... by licking you. Owie, that lick really hurt.

Keep in mind that while I am praising the graphics, I still feel I would have kind of felt let down by them back in the day. By Mega Drive/Turbo Grafx 16/SNES standards, Bubsy would have looked and sounded pretty amazing. However, this was at a time of change for home consoles, the 16-bit era was fading and 32-bit consoles had just arrived.Sony's Playstation and Sega's Saturn were blowing people's minds with crisp polygons, full motion video, high quality audio, the works. Besides, Bubsy was on the Atari Jaguar, a 64-bit system (ahem), and having 'pretty-good-for-SNES' just wouldn't have cut the cake, so to speak. Also, while the game does look quite nice paused, most of the animations are just a few frames, making most movements seem pretty jerky.

Another gripe I have with this game is that one of the main game mechanics (which it took me quite a while to even get to) is really bloody annoying. You have to go through a door, which takes you to another door in a different area of the stage. Unless you know the levels really well, you're going to get lost super easily. It's almost like you need to make a map as you go to save yourself from confusion. To make matters worse, when you die it's likely that you are going to be sent back to a check point before the last door you went through, and for the most part the areas don't look all that different from each other, leading to yet more confusion.

He looks like an arrogant twat, because he is.

After I finally managed to get to the second chapter of the Alice in Wonderland stage, I managed to fall down a few wells, die a few more times, get lost among a load more doors, and then I found... a flashing t-shirt? I've found a few shirts with numbers on, giving me extra lives, but what could a flashing one do? Great Scott! Invincibility! Finally some reprieve! I must say that after spending so much time scared of going anywhere near enemies in case they kill me, suddenly I can run into any enemy and destroy it. I go slap-happy and run into anything I can see, I've gone flashing-shirt-crazy! It wears off... death.

Okay , so after over two hours of  playing, getting pissed off, taking a break to write some stuff down, playing, getting pissed off, taking a break to write some stuff down, playing, getting lost...you get the idea (plus more than a few game overs, yikes!), I have finally reached the first stage boss, and it looks insane. The mad hatter is in a huge spiked teapot tank, shooting lethal steam at me. 

Bet he'd make one hell of a cuppa...

What is this strange feeling? I'm not sure about 'fun' per se, but a small sense of accomplishment after finally getting this far? ...and I promptly died. I didn't even think to pause and take a picture, the above photo is nicked off the internet. Oh well, I'll get there on the next life, right?

Damn. Game Over. Damn, damn.

This game has broken my will. I tried to get back into it, and breezed through the first part of the first level, then got back into the same old cycle of death. Maybe I'm just no good at this game, but I can't bring myself to play that same stage anymore. Even worse, the manual says there are continue-points that let me restart the game at the beginning of that level. I only went through one in the first level anyway. Boo.

Honestly, when you stay alive long enough to get a decent bit of exploring done, this game actually has a small amount of fun value to it. When you think you're about to die from running into an enemy, then the enemy inexplicably dies, there's a small feeling of victory. I almost feel like once you completely memorize the levels, get the inertia-control down to a t and get over the fact that you're still going to die a lot, this game may even be slightly enjoyable. I feel that if there were an 'easy' mode, and a few tweaks were made to the game's physics, Bubsy in: Fractured Furry Tales could have had potential to be a genuinely good platformer, but it was just off in too many places. 

Fortunately, one of the few redeeming factors Fractured Furry Tales has is it's password system. Even if I'm not good enough to beat the first level, I can at least have a peek at the rest of the game.

The second set of 3 chapters are set in Jack and the Beanstalk. There are wasps (which were also, for no real reason, in Alice in Wonderland, too) , ants and nights in shining armor. Nice imagination, guys. To be fair, in this level there is one character I really like the design of...

N'awwwwwwww

That's a snail, and it's shell has a little chimney. And when it pokes it's head back inside it's shell, it puts out a little 'out to lunch' sign. Is that not the cutest thing you've seen in the last 5 minutes? No? Well go back to playing with your stupid cat/dog/child then, I'm happy with a cartoon snail.

The next stages' theme is Arabian Nights, although how much this actually has to do with Arabian Nights is somewhat suspect. When the manual says 'Busby and the Arabian Nights' I think they meant "We've done a castle level and a jungle level, we'd better do a desert level now". Crikey, anyone would think there might be a water level next! (wink,wink).

Anyway, these levels have everything you would expect from a desert level. Snake charmer-ish music, blokes with big turbans swinging swords, lizards, vultures, snakes, cactus people...

... glass bottles with legs that randomly jump out of the sand at you? Okay, so that's a new one.

That cactus is wearing sneakers, for sneaking!

I actually played the desert levels for a while. There were a few fun new ways to get around, floating platforms that appear when you hit your head on them (quite annoying) and tents you had to bounce on. The bouncing was almost fun, but you would always have to reach some tiny gap and there would be enemies or other hazards waiting to catch you when you fall. Did I mention that this game is hard? 

Next up, as I had foreseen (admittedly I may have seen it in the manual) is a water world. The name of the world is 'WaterBubsy' I'm not entirely sure if that was supposed to be a pun on WaterWorld or some other crap, I mean WaterWorld is hardly a fairy tale, or if they had run so low on ideas that they literally just named the world what it was. Water + Bubsy = WaterBubsy.

There's a reason everyone's least favorite level is the water level, especially in platformers. Gravity normally goes sort of floaty and you have less control of your character. Mario, Sonic, Turtles, Banjo, you name it. If it has a water level, it's bound to be considerably harder than the other levels. I assume this is the same for Bubsy? Nah. Nothing changes. Bubsy has an air bubble drawn around him, but the gameplay stays exactly the same. To be honest I'm a little disappointed. Mainly because Bubsy is hard enough to control anyway, and I wanted to see how badly they could mess it up. I guess one good decision made while making this game was to not make anything even more difficult.

♫ Darling it's better, down where it's wetter, take it from meeee ♫

Again, the enemies are just standard under the sea fare. Seahorses, Mermaids, Sharks... Bomb dropping Hamsters in submarines. Eh, Okay? I think they might have just picked one 'zany' character for each level. Punk flamingo, Snail House, Bottle Legs, Sub-Hamster. Actually, it's pretty lame. It's like they knew they knew that the game didn't make sense, so they just lobbed in some half-baked character ideas as filler. They made them zany and wacky because kids love zany and wacky, right? Oy vey.

Right-o only one set of stages left now, and it's Hansel and Gretel.

Custard pie? Lemme have it!

I'm not sure which the zany character is here, there's a pie throwing machine. A Never Ending Pie Throwing Robot, if you will. There is also a man made of forks. That's it. There are two unique enemies that I could find on this stage, the rest are wasps and inanimate objects. Cookies (again!) falling chocolate and milk bottle lids are the hazards here. 

One good thing about this level is the milk bottle tunnel system. The tops of milk bottles pop off and you have to get in the bottle before the cap comes back down. You can then travel through layers of cake. I mean, it still doesn't make the level great, but it's a nice touch.

And this is as far as I'm willing to go. I've been playing this crappy game all day and I just have no desire to try and get through to the bosses and actually complete it. I have a feeling that if I tried it would either take years, or I would die or go insane.

True, Bubsy in: Fractured Furry Tales isn't the worst game I've ever played. Some (albeit very small) parts of the game are actually fairly enjoyable, and when you've been grinding at a level for an hour, then finally complete it, that's a great feeling. It's just a shame that it has to be preceded by an hour of depression, really. 

There are some nice graphical touches here and there. Most of the worlds and their backgrounds, with the fairy tale theme remind me of some of the Mickey Mouse games. I don't mean that in a nice nostalgic way, though. They just make me think "Oh god, why am I wasting my time on this when I could be playing 'Castle Of Illusion' or 'Mickey's Wild Adventure'."

If I forced myself to say one more positive (well, neutral) thing about this game, it would be that the soundtrack is fine. Not good, not bad, just fine. Distinctly not-memorable, but certainly nothing that got too annoying, even when I had to play the same level over and over.

And now, here's a guest speaker for the final verdict:

Spyro does not approve.

Well if Spyro disapproves, then so do I.

Is Bubsy in: Fractured Furry Tales really that bad? Yeah, it kinda is. 

Cheers for reading, 

Dusty Old Games.

Xonox Double Ender - Sir Lancelot and Robin Hood - Atari 2600

Here's an odd thing. I had never heard of one of these until one popped up cheap on eBay and I nabbed it.

Basically, the Xonox Double Ender is two Atari 2600 games stuck to each other end to end, effectively giving a 2-in-1 cartridge. Both of the cartridges, Robin Hood and Sir Lancelot were available separately, and from what I gather from the Internet, are quite rare.

I'd double your ender...

The cartridge is quite a bit heavier than a normal 2600 cart, probably down to the fact that it is physically larger and also has more circuit board inside it. It also has some pleasingly solid knobbly bits on each side. It is roughly 1.5x the height of a normal 2600 cartridge. 

Robin Hood

Robin Hood is an adventure/shooting game that seems to have potential, but is unfortunately a bit naff.

In the first screen, you are in a forest and have to shoot arrows at some guys that keep spawning out of the trees (presumably the Sheriff of Nottingham's cronies). This first screen should be simple enough, but you can't move once you shoot, the bad guys are faster than you, if they touch you they kill you and sometimes they spawn right on top of you. It takes a fair amount of luck and practice just to get off this screen, especially on the hardest of the 3 difficulty settings, and it can get pretty frustrating.

More like Robin Poo-d, am I right?

After killing a certain amount of enemies, the number of which I'm not certain, it seems to take longer sometimes, a long tone plays and you can pass on to the next screen. Then you have to shoot a load more baddies, lower the drawbridge and cross into the castle, all while avoiding arrows coming from the sides of the screen. I find this screen easier, it seems that there is less chance of the enemies spawning on top of you.

From there you move into the castle and have to find Maid Marian behind a door. Unfortunately, most of the time it's just more enemies coming to shoot you, or occasionally a blob (possibly gold?) that gives you some points.

This game is frustrating and just not very good, I really wouldn't recommend it. Espescially given what's on the other side of the Double Ender!

Sir Lancelot

A good game! Huzzah!

Sir Lancelot plays a lot like Joust, which is a pretty good start.

In the first screen, you are on your mighty winged steed jumping on the heads of unsuspecting dragons until you clear the screen. The gravity/flying mechanic is very similar indeed to Joust, in fact I would not be surprised if Sir Lancelot is just a hack of the original.

That princess is one sexy mess of pixels.

Where Sir Lancelot differs from Joust is in it's second screen. A huge dragon looms overhead behind a magical barrier, dropping fire on your head like rain from the heavens!  You must save the princess in peril on the other side of a massive fire lake!

The game continues between these two screens, with larger monsters that act differently and stronger dragons, until screen 8 which then wins the game. In later stages the lava pool also rises up with time, endangering your beloved princess!

I really enjoy this game. If I had a friend over, I would much rather be playing Joust. I think Joust is one of the best 2 player games on the 2600. However, when I'm playing alone I think Sir Lancelot offers a bit more variety and maybe a little more fun. Plus you get to save a ravishing young pixellated maiden (or at least, some kind of tiny, mangled stick figure) from a dragon, and who doesn't like to do that?


Xonox Double Ender
The Xonox Double Ender does not have the greatest games on it, nor is it the rarest or most prized game for the Atari 2600. However, it is a nice quirky thing that wasn't afraid to look and feel different to the other carts.
Sure, it doesn't fit on my shelf nicely. Sure it means I have to move my Atari so I can fit the cartridge in. Sure I have no idea how to pronounce 'Xonox', but these are all reasons for me to love it more. It's my freaky cartridge baby.

Cross Force - Atari 2600 (Spectravideo)

Cross Force from Spectravideo is a rare thing for the Atari 2600, it's a space ship shooter.
"But Dusty Old Games," I hear you scream, "there's a million and one space ship shooters for the 2600! Pheonix, Demon Attack, Galaxian, Star Raiders! "

Right you are reader, the 2600 certainly got it's fair share of space shooters. However, great though a lot of them are, most kept to the tried and tested formula. You are a ship at the bottom of the screen. Enemies are at the top of the screen. Shoot them. If you were really lucky, games like Vanguard, Yar's Revenge or Stargate (Defender) would come along and flip that game style horizontally.

Now I'm not complaining, that sort of game works. It gave us some fantastic games that have rightly earned their places on my shelves. What makes cross force different and interesting however is that you don't control one, but two gun/ship things, and what really gives me a developed case of brain wow is that you don't even have to shoot straight up!

Your two guns straddle the space in which enemies appear, one at the top and one at the bottom. 
Pressing right on the joystick makes the lower gun move right, and the upper gun move left, and vice versa. When you fire, rather than a mere pellet shooting out, a huge throbbing vein (heh) of lightning joins your two guns, blasting anything out of it's way with that lovely 2600 zap sound we all know and love.

If you're really lucky, all your enemies will line up diagonally (almost as if they want to die) and you can clear a whole screen of enemies with one delicious zap.

If this all sounds too simple for you, think again. The large 'mothership' you can see in the picture above keeps coming past and dropping off various enemies, which in turn drop off bombs on to your guns, which are one hit kills. Also, note the E---F gauge and the H gauge. Your guns run on fuel, the more you move, the more you use. You then have to shoot flashing asterisks ( fuel containers, you have to use your imagination a bit with 2600 games)  to refuel. However, the more you shoot, the closer to overheating (H) your guns get!

Managing this is easy enough for the first little while of the game, but as more enemies come they will move faster, meaning you have to move faster. They will drop more bombs both up and down, meaning you have to move out of the way more often. There is less fuel available, meaning you have to manage movement more carefully.

After playing for a while, like all the best Atari games, Cross Force becomes incredibly addictive. I had planned on playing for half an hour or so to freshen my memory prior to writing this review and accidentally ended up wasting half the afternoon away.

Despite the fact that it is fairly hard to come by and only ever got a North American release (yet inexplicably works fine on my UK console) I think most 2600 collectors would really enjoy this title, and it is a valuable addition to anyone's collection if you can hunt it down.

Cheers for reading,
Dusty Old Games

Chip's Challenge - Atari Lynx

Chip's Challenge is one of those games that you definitely would not buy just by looking at the box. A nerd runs away from a set of teeth, clutching a key. The 'story' on the back reads:

"Before Chip can join the Bit Busters computer club and hang out with the girl of his dreams Melinda the Mental Marvel he must solve all 144 challenging puzzles"

That has to be the lamest storyline for a game I've ever heard. Imagine seeing that box on a shelf next to similar Lynx puzzle games like Super Skweek or Crystal Mines II, with artwork sporting funky cartoons on cosmic dance floors or golems and robots, and talk of treasures and monsters. Who in their right mind would choose the one about a nerd after some 'Mental Marvel'?

Fortunately for those who did choose Chip's Challenge, looks can be deceiving, and they were treated to what is in my opinion one of the best, if not the best puzzle game for the Lynx, and also resides somewhere in my top 20 puzzle games of all time (I might do a blog post on that at some point).

Chip's Challenge was released in 1989 developed by Epyx originally exclusively for the Atari Lynx, which is the version I am reviewing. It was so popular that it was then ported to many home consoles and computers, and Microsoft even released it as part of the 'Microsoft Best of Entertainment Pack' in 1991.

Image from AtariAge.com

Before I get on to the gameplay, I feel I should mention the quality of the soundtrack. Some of the in game music can get a bit jarring, especially if you get stuck on the same level for a long time. However, the overall quality and range of the music is pretty impressive considering the age of the game, and also that it was a handheld cartridge game. The opening screen music is genuinely listenable and there are a few head bobbing chip tunes in there. I feel this really shows off how advanced the Lynx was for the time. Seriously, go and listen to it here.

The actual gameplay is every bit as good, if not better. The first few levels introduce you to the different game mechanics, from simply walking and collecting keys to avoiding bugs, making bridges, using shields and much more. These first levels have a very generous time limit, giving the player ample chance to complete the levels without too much hassle.The main point of each puzzle is to collect all the chips so you can reach the warp tile to get to the next level.

The sheer variety of the levels and music keep Chip's Challenge from becoming boring, instead it is enticing from start to end, which considering the length of the game is quite something. 144 puzzles were included in the original Lynx version and while some levels can be quite frustrating, I certainly enjoyed it from start to finish. Fortunately, there is no need to complete the entire game in one sitting, as a nice short password system is in place, allowing for multiple play sessions. This is great because the Lynx is a huge bulky machine, and you will probably need to give your hands a break after a while.

Yowzer! Image from AtariAge.com

Getting around obstacles and enemies in Chip's Challenge is very straightforward and simple to learn, not to say that the game is easy (hint: it's not). You use the D-pad to move Chip, and that's it. To collect items you just stand on the same tile as them. All items are used automatically once you have them. Once you pick up the water shield you can walk on water, once you pick up the fire shield you can walk through fire, once you have a key you can pass through a door etc.

Despite the simplicity there are a few obstacles that make the game significantly more interesting. You can push dirt tiles around to make bridges over water, or use teleport tiles to move from one space in the maze to another. Avoiding enemies and cherry bombs also adds a bit of action to the otherwise purely puzzle based fun.

I feel that Chip's Challenge on the Lynx is fairly overlooked. Most fans of the game remember it from the PC version (which was also very good). While my love of old consoles and cartridge games in general may skew my opinion slightly I think the Lynx version is actually better, and is a must have for any Lynx owner.

Cheers for reading,
Dusty Old Games.